Kinderen & Ouders
vrijheid toestaan, privacy respecteren & intelligentie voeden.
Parenting the new child.
granting freedom, respecting privacy & nourishing intelligence.
This week it´s again a book in the Dutch language, which is translated from the original: ´Parenting the new child´ from Osho.
Personally this is one of my favorite books. Is a small size which is ideal to take it with you, is not very thick and as a parent I personally find it very interesting. This book gives you a different perspective on raising your children.
Are you pregnant, know someone who is, are you a mom (or dad) ? I really reccommend this book for us as parents.
A child has more right to privacy and freedom than the parents,– Osho –
it is at the beginning of his life.
It has a right to be itself!
I did not agree with the sentence above at first. I bought this book when I was pregnant with our oldest. Until I had read the book a few times and became a mother myself, I started speaking like this. It sounds crazy and weird at first, but children really have a right (and need) for privacy and freedom. We shouldn’t push them, not claim them and just release them. Let them self discover, this is THEIR life. But Osho explains it much better in the book.
They came through us but they are not ours. Yes read that sentence again. Children may come through the father and mother and yes the child is 9 months in a woman’s belly. BUT this does not mean it is theirs / theirs. And that is how many parents think and act and we only hinder our children with that. I am convinced that children choose their parents.
And it’s hard, I’ll tell you that honestly. As a mother, to let your children go. I think that’s because a mother is afraid of losing her child, of not being connected anymore, but that connection will always be there. First 9 months in the stomach and then that band remains, that connection.
Being a mother of 3 and kind of a control freak, this was and is difficult for me. But I know I am doing my children a favor by letting them go of and living their own lives, explore. Even though they are so small.
No I am not saying that you should let them do or try everything, you should certainly pay attention when it is playing, but let it explore that playground and not be on top of it all the time.
Every child is born intelligent, bright, clean but then we start to bury it with all kinds of junk. A child needs unrestricted privacy and parent should only do something to help them not to interfere. The child should be allowed to do or not to do things, Parents should just watch that he doesn hurt himself or others, that´s enough. Believe me, the bond between you and your child will only improve on this!
Do not take it too seriously,– Osho –
otherwise you will distroy the child.
Do it playfully.
As a mom i know the best that raising children is a challenge. It involve many aspects of personality and emotions. Things we grew up with or value ourselves often no longer fit in the developing society from now, but we still want to give our children a good start in their future. Attention is required heren, so that we don´t fall into the trap of simply repeating our own experiences and beliefs. But also do not mechanically fall in the oppisite.
How do we find the golden mean between keeping everything under control and leaving them too much freedom, where it´s important to respect the rights of the child and to demand this respect for themselves.
Ofcourse you have a responsibility, but take it very playfully.
🖤 🖤 🖤 🖤 🖤